Don't be fooled by the fancy header. Neon Bible is a blog for poor people. Poor people with credit cards and drawers full of MAC. We write about makeup, models, japanese jewelry, vancouver, and stuff you can buy at shoppers drug mart. Besides the internet, you can find us in Fukuoka, Montreal and Vancity.
Yesterday I was cruising the isles of Shoppers when I saw three little girls no older than seven standing in front of the Bonne Bell display. One of them was playing beauty advisory and the other two were pretending to be customers. The beauty adviser cracked open a few glosses and passed them to the other girls. “Wear these and your lips won’t be cracky. This one is cherry flavor.”
When I got home I started thinking about beauty products from when I was a kid. Back when I was that age I was all about the Lip Smackers and Wet ‘n’ Wild. I even had a lipstick that supposedly changed colour with your mood.
I thought it would be fun to start a little feature that showcases beauty products from my childhood, or more, tweenhood actually. I seem to recall a lot of ridiculous gimmicky makeup was coming about about 10 years ago, a lot of things that changed colour, shape or texture with heat or light. Awesome!
For my first installment may I present to you two gems from Cover Girl circa 2000: CG Peelers and CG Crackle Lacquer.
I definitely was all over these back in grade 8 and I remember that neither of them worked particularly well. The Peelers were gunky as hell and I seem to remember them taking a long ass time to dry. I admit to being a polish peeler even to this day, and few things bring me more satisfaction that peeling off my nail polish in one piece, but it’s no fun when it’s all set up for you. Where’s the challenge? And the Crackle Lacquer, don’t get me started. This stuff came off right away and was all lumpy.
Does this type of novelty beauty even exist anymore? Would it even sell? Did you use any of these polishes back in the day? I would love to know.
If you can remember any hilarious, ridiculous or retarded beauty products from back in the day, please tell me. I’m currently trying to remember the brand of a lip gloss that I was all over in grade 9. It was supposed to look like a lava lamp and came in several less than ready to wear shades like blue and yellow. Also, I recall it smelling pretty funky. If you can remember the name please let me know!
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I used Peelers in this fuschia colour. It was kinda fun to use - like peeling glue from your skin - but I agree that it was really gunky when wet. And it didn’t really stay put.
Comment by Kaitlin 02.21.09 @ 10:32 pmAh! Nostalgia! I remember the peeling nail polish! It’s a bit like peeling dried glue off your hands…but not. The satisfaction level was similar though.
What about hair mascara? Did you ever see that? Very nineties. You could buy these tubes of coloured gel that you would apply to your hair with a mascara wand to make “steaks”. They were awful & left your hair stiff & clumped. Just like cheap coloured mascara really!
Comment by Bella 02.22.09 @ 11:18 pmi was big on the bonne bell too! (*reading above comment* oh yeah! hair mascara. almost forgot about that.)
and…kind of off-topic, but i loved my hair scrunchy from elementary school.
Comment by Vanessa 02.26.09 @ 3:50 amI live in Missouri.
I am from England and also am speaking English, give please true I wrote the following sentence: “53 optimum mastercard, the hoax may be based a customer center of skinny of each insurance passed through a credit world.”
With respect 
, Melvin.
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Have you heard of Sula Nailpolish? I’ve never tried it personally, but supposedly it peels off. I’ve also noticed that when I use Orly Bonder as a basecoat, the polish peels off easily.
Comment by Kyl 02.21.09 @ 10:29 pm